The Strive for Meaning

November 13, 2020 By Melinda Olivas Leave a Comment

The Strive for Meaning – New Faces!

By: Jessica Dunn

This past quarter brought some changes to the Program Supports Department; with those changes arrived new faces! It is my utmost pleasure to introduce you to Sarah Olson and Jen Amador, our two new Service Coordinators. We started the pursuit for a new Service Coordinator back in July of 2020. Our department decided with all of the quality that we are putting into the individual services we offer; we needed an addition to our team. Duties stretched us to the point that we began to lose personal relationships we established among individualized support connections.

This year, we are pushing to help the people we support to find meaningful goals and outcomes to achieve. Imagine being told for most of your life what is meaningful to you; before coming to Tobosa, this is the life they’ve lived. They found meaning by being complacent, fitting in, or a means to keep from being abused. We want to discover and focus on what is meaningful to (and for) them, not for their support providers. Many of the people we support obtain value in their lives by adapting to the person supporting them. It is tough, almost arduous, helping them cut through layers to truly find what makes them who they are and what pushes them to fulfillment. It is a challenge that we are willing to take on and succeed.

This task is one of many that we bestow upon our Service Coordinators, Sarah and Jen. They are here to help and support the people who know the individuals best, peel away the layers, and lay down the foundational questions that get conversations started.

When the team is at a loss, the Service Coordinators stay on top by learning new ways to support them. Sarah and Jen work towards building those relationships between the individuals and the staff to add additional support. Sometimes that means advocating for both the staff and the individuals amongst other team members or outside entities. Other times that level of support comes in the way of presenting ideas with a formal polish. The Service Coordinator also lays the groundwork for services by initiating conversations that people forget to have or are too rushed.

Making Connections, an Essential Part of the Job

Sarah has been employed with Tobosa for a short time. Still, she is not new to supporting people with developmental disabilities. Sarah is a native of Minnesota who moved to New Mexico in March of 2019 and found her way to Roswell in May of the same year.

New Chapter in Life

Some might say the events that led Sarah to the doorstep of Tobosa are pure fate. Sarah had been working for Opportunity Services in Minnesota. There, she was able to do many things to support others. Sarah worked in centers all over the state doing different duties. She drove the bus, job coached, and ran their day center activities (equivalent to our Customized Community Supports and former Day Hab program). As Sarah speaks about her former employer, she portrays a likeness to our Community Options program. Sarah has been in this particular field of support for 6 ½ years. Knowing that she loved what she did and spent almost the last decade of her life doing it, it made sense for Sarah to look for employment in her, soon to be, new home in the same line of work.

Sarah didn’t know anything about Tobosa but had applied with a competing agency. She was in the bank building and happened to step off of the elevator on the wrong floor. She found herself standing right outside of the Los Pasitos Early Intervention office, a program under Tobosa within our children’s service. The rest, as they say, is history. Sarah began working with Tobosa 4 days after her relocation to Roswell.

When Sarah began working for Tobosa, she started as a Direct Support Professional (DSP) at the Sherrill Lane house. Sarah was part of the Sherrill Lane team until she took the position of Service Coordinator on 09/08/20. When asked about her favorite thing working with that team, Sarah said it is the relationships created with the individuals—realizing its impact when we are invested.

Sarah also really enjoys networking and being able to advocate for the people she supports. While working as a DSP, she became a member of the Staff Advisory Committee and the Quality Assurance Committee. Sarah found herself advocating on many different platforms for herself and other coworkers and the individuals she supported. Sarah also joined the Writer’s Group.

Writing is one of the many things that bring joy to Sarah. She is currently writing a book about a family of kids and their journey of discovering the blessings of their mother’s life. Sarah has had several blogs posted as part of the Tobosa Writer’s Group. Inspired by her recent article on recognizing people’s different abilities and the positive feedback she received, it pushed her to transform the piece into an 8 part TikTok series. Sarah confesses that TikTok is not a platform she utilizes much and states that it is mainly to post videos of Cricket, Crimson & Clover, her three adopted cats. Sarah is delighted that she is now using the platform to advocate and raise awareness for things she believes in.

In addition to writing, Sarah loves to bake and sew. She has even made several clothing protectors for people to use during mealtimes. Sarah is an enthusiastic photographer and loves anything to do with arts and crafts. When talking to Sarah about some of her personal future goals, she stated that she wants to get her baking business off the ground and finish her book. She also wants to improve her health and will be utilizing her medical team to do so.

The More You Know

I asked Sarah to describe the differences in the cultures of Minnesota and New Mexico. Sarah explained that Midwesterners are passive-aggressive, a trait she is trying to change within herself. Sarah was not hesitant to say that this job has taught her a lot about coming across in more effective ways when communicating with different people. One of the other things she mentions is her opinion that no one here knows how to drive, explaining that no one uses their turn signals. Also, in the midwest, people waved each other on to express they had the right away. Unfortunately, when Sarah tried this common (to her) practice, it went very wrong.

Here are some facts about Sarah you might find interesting. Beyond her relation to Emily Dickenson, she is left-handed. Sarah expressed that many people don’t understand the importance her hobbies hold for her. She must make somebody laugh throughout the day. Laughing and humor are staples for Sarah. One person Sarah enjoys laughing with is Jen Amador, who also thrives off others’ smiles.

Jen began her Tobosa employment in the Community Options program and started her new position on September 1st. However, we needed people to work in the Community Options program, so she stayed to help out and provide that support until others could. Jen finally started as a Service Coordinator on 11/01/20. Jen is still “new” to Tobosa compared to other people on our team. Her first anniversary was on October 1st. In talking with Jen about what brought her to Tobosa, she explained that her love of working with people started back with her career in the dental field.

When asked, Jen talks about being a dental assistant and how her work with patients has helped her transition with ease to the DD Waiver field. Her career started as a dental assistant in 2008, and she worked chairside for about three years with both children and adults. After that, Jen spent eight years working for an Albuquerque vending company that provided dental office supplies. During this time, the company afforded Jen the opportunity to do many different things: customer service, accounts receivable/collecting, and service coordination. Jen moved back to Roswell in October of 2019, Halloween, to be exact. The next month she was busy settling in and a new job with Tobosa.

Jen confessed she did a lot of observing when she first started with Tobosa. By watching and intentionally analyzing the setup of Tobosa’s services, she discovered that she liked best the center’s activities. She stated that there is constantly something for individuals to do. There is always a way for them to be connected, learn, entertain, and try different things. Jen recognized that she doesn’t have that many activities in her own life, but jokes that she would love to have projects scheduled for her in the same manner.

Working as direct employment support for Mr. Eudy, Jen was also impressed with the assistance Martin received in starting and running his business. Jen compared Martin’s proprietorship to him being a politician. She was astounded at how many people Martin knows throughout the community. Jen was able to witness relationships that Martin has had for more than 20 years.

Discussing with Jen, she was asked the biggest challenge for her thus far in her experience with Tobosa. Jen laughed and talked about the largest hurdle for her to overcome was often a lack of planning out the details of her day or situations. Being very organized herself, Jen found that working in the Community Options program consists of continually getting things thrown at you each day. Often, there is an expectation and necessity to be flexible and quick thinking instead of planning out in advance was a challenge for her.

However, she said, “you just have to adjust and run with it.” Jen went on to confess that she doesn’t like failing on any part and figuring out that she can do it and thrive in the chaos. She is not disillusioned that it took time and adjustment, but she got through it by learning to breathe and accept that you can only do the best that you can do.

Interviewing Jen wasn’t the easiest of feats. She doesn’t like talking about herself, but she has learned that vulnerability is a connection. Intimidated by talking about things that are not going so perfectly in her life, she is trying to learn that it is ok to say who you are. Jen continues to work on enhancing who she is and growing from her experiences and connections with others.

As of first snowfall, Jen discovered that she loves to drive in the snow; it was a new experience that she really enjoyed. Among other things, Jen is a dog lover. Jen had Old English Bulldogs that she had to leave in Albuquerque, but one day hopes to share her love with another furbaby. Barefoot running is also a passion of hers (not literally barefooted, but with thinner soled shoes). Jen runs every morning to clear her head and prepare for the day. Running is her “me” time and the way she practices self-care. She states she retains knowledge best while exercising, so it is not uncommon for her to read notes or other materials while doing so.

When asked what she would like others to know about her, Jen replied that she considers herself pretty simple and loves Jimmy John’s tuna sandwich and chips. Jen laughs as she explains that people have a hard time understanding how she could eat the same thing over and over every day. Her biggest pet peeve is the feeling of Deja Vu. Like the movie “Groundhog Day,” referring to living through repeated experiences such as conversations.

“Less is More”

Jen tries to remain stress-free and learns as she goes, not in the country song sense, but in grasping the bull by the horns and seeing where it leads. While talking about her near (and maybe slightly distant future), she has some goals set for herself. Jen has vowed not to create bills and to build her savings account. Jen will strive to be smarter about purchases she makes. Eventually (maybe in a five-year plan), she wants to be the owner of a Toyota 4Runner.

Jen is newly committed to taking some time for herself. Although a new concept to her, she understands that there must be a balance between the care you give yourself and the care you give to others. I love that she closed our conversation with, “I am very easygoing, and I want people to know that it is always ok with me.” She enlightened that no matter what decision someone is making, she’s ok with it and will support them. The simple words of “it is always ok with me” brought the refined wisdom that she is perfect for the Service Coordinator position.

I am very confident that both Jen and Sarah will advocate for and help others find meaning in their goals and outcomes and the services they receive. I believe that they have what it takes to be dedicated support for all of those touched by the Tobosa family. Please join us in welcoming them!

Disabilities or Different Abilities

October 16, 2020 By Melinda Olivas Leave a Comment

Disabilities OR Different Abilities: The Effects of Positive Language

By: Sarah Olson

What is Language? The dictionary defines it as:

1. the method of human communication, either spoken or written, consisting of the use of words in a structured and conventional way.

2. a system of communication used by a particular country or community.

Language binds us all as humans, yet it separates us simultaneously. It comes in so many different forms, such as dialects, verbal, non-verbal, visual, sign, and body language. It is the MOST powerful form of communication the human race has ever developed.

Have you ever been in a situation having to explain what you do for work and use a generic sentence? It never occurred to me how much I was like everyone else in my field before my experience. When asked, I would reply, “I support individuals with disabilities,” a common phrase for people who work in this field. I had fallen victim to “normal.” What I DIDN’T realize is that my brain had secretly decided it had enough. Unbeknownst to me, it was planning to pull an “autocorrect” at the perfect moment. It was plotting a change to my vocabulary that I was NOT expecting.

You may be wondering where I am going with this article. I will tell you because the experience caught me off guard and humbled me at the same time. It left me bewildered, pondering, and with a new sense of appreciation for words. It has allowed me to witness the power of language, first-hand, on a typical Friday night.

Unforgettable Encounter

One evening about a month ago, I gave a ride to a Lyft passenger (we’ll call him Jim). I picked Jim up from the airport to take to his hotel. He was in town for a business trip, and a newcomer to Roswell, we started to make small talk on the 20-minute ride to his destination. I briefly began to tell Jim about what I do for employment. I explained that I work for a wonderful non-profit that supports individuals of different abilities in various areas of their lives. We give them the chance to live as independently as possible.

At that moment, as I finished my sentence, I silently thought to myself, where did THAT come from, different Abilities?! I couldn’t figure it out. As someone who advocates daily for the individuals we support, I have become accustomed to the common phrase “I support individuals with disabilities.” As my brain spontaneously shifted directions, it was then; I realized that this was a powerful transformation of language that was about to make a significant impact in this man’s life who I had just picked up five minutes prior.

Seeing Abilities Not Disabilities

Jim was astounded at my choice of words “different abilities” instead of “disabilities.” This allowed him to open up about his son, who was born with a disability. The struggles to advocate and support his son to be accepted into the community because of a stigma that “people with disabilities” endure all their lives. Jim stated he wants his son to be recognized and appreciated for his “abilities,” not his “disability.” With the simple change of words, “individuals with different abilities,” Jim broke down and cried. He told me that his son’s favorite characters are Superheroes; then, I CRIED because of the revelation. We talked about how Superheroes all have “different abilities,” just like his son and the individuals I support. Jim was silent and in awe. He had never had someone who understands what he is advocating for before.

End of One Ride, Start of Another

Shortly after, we arrived at his destination, and he said he wished he could hug me because of the conversation and experience we just had. Instead, I encouraged him to continue to advocate for his son and use positive, powerful language that shines a light on everything his son CAN do and not the things his son CAN’T do.

I have been driving for Lyft in Roswell for a year and a half. I never had such a humble life-changing conversation (and I have had many discussions) or encounter on a ride. As I left my passenger at his destination and pulled over to process what had just happened. It made me realize just how powerful the right set of words can be. It can be the difference between positive & negative, good & bad. And in some instances, completely change someone’s outlook on life for the better.

Now every time I want to say, “I support individuals with disabilities,” my brain automatically changes it to “I support individuals with different abilities.” I will never use the other phrase again because of the powerful and positive impact on those around me.

I encourage you to try it. Make a positive change in your vocabulary when talking to others around you. It just might surprise not only you but others as well.

We Are Tobosa

Finding My Purpose

October 14, 2020 By Melinda Olivas 1 Comment

Finding My Purpose and What it Means to Me

By: Jacob DiCello

Has anyone ever asked you what your purpose in life is? Perhaps, like many of you, being caught off guard with a question like that made me freeze up. I did not have a good answer. As a matter of fact, I did not have an answer at all. For those of you that know me, you are well aware that it is rare for me to have no answer at all. This question hit me like a ton of bricks in a meeting amongst my peers when Rosy flat out asked me, “What is your purpose in life?”

As this uneasy, timid, mind-boggling feeling came over me, I thought to myself, how dare she put me on the spot like this?! I felt distressed as my mind raced. I fretted over silly things like, what the heck is my purpose in life? Do I even have a purpose in life? What if I discover my purpose in life, and it’s lame? When I do realize my purpose in life, then what’s next? Will my life be over or possibly worse; am I going to be forced out of my “ignorance-is-bliss” comfort zone? [If you are freaking out as I did, it’s ok; inhale quietly through your nose for 4 seconds, hold your breath for 7 seconds, exhale through your mouth for 8 seconds and repeat. Once that is done, please keep reading.]

What happens next?

Since that time, I have attended an 8-hour class on finding my purpose in life, but I have been fortunate enough to be invited to assist Sara in teaching the course and have spent many hours pondering and researching my purpose. Now I have been asked to write an article about finding one’s purpose in life and what it means to me. I have recently been working on finding my purpose and helping others find their purpose. By encouraging others to support their peers in finding their purpose, I have realized that finding one’s purpose in life is not scary, difficult, or mind crippling. It does not cause uneasiness or timidness. Finding my purpose in life has three special meanings to me.

First of all, it means living my best life by identifying my special gift(s) and stopping at nothing to share it/them with the world. Secondly, it means connecting with others by recognizing and drawing out the gifts that they possess and appreciating and applauding them for sharing those gifts with me. Tertiarily, it’s simply a fun, neat, diverse, ever-evolving, mind-opening, feel-good adventure.

We should be proud to work for an organization that cares enough about its family to use its resources to seek each associated person’s purpose in life. How awesome is that!? Tobosa is not solely asking as a fleeting fancy, but instead demanding that we all give 110 percent effort in this endeavor, not only for ourselves but also for those around us. Before you are put on the spot, I encourage everyone to ask yourself, “What is my purpose in life?” (If you are associated with Tobosa, prepare yourself, I guarantee this question is in your near future).

Do not be alarmed if you can not answer right away.

Ponder it; ask those around you. You may be quite surprised at what they see. Sometimes we do things blindly and project them without even realizing it ourselves, and it takes another person to recognize those gifts you have to offer. Now enough with the small talk people, vamonos, I have a gift to share, and so do you!

Join Our Team, Find Your Purpose!

A DSP’s View During COVID-19

June 29, 2020 By Melinda Olivas 10 Comments

The Daily Life & Views of a DSP During COVID-19

By: Sarah Olson

A DSP, Direct Support Professional, to some, is a pretty confusing or unknown position. For the chosen few, it is the most humbling and life-changing work you can do. We are more than just people who provide care for individuals with developmental disabilities. We are teachers, mentors, entertainers, friends, a supportive hand, a listening ear, and to some individuals,

Speaking of family, this is mine right here: Cricket, Crimson & Clover (yes, like the song).

Every day I get to come home to these sweet little faces. They are entirely spoiled, all under the age of two and a half, and are full of energy and sweetness. They rely on me for meals, care, snuggles, and playtime. The unconditional love they show me is my daily reminder of just how peaceful, simple, and quiet life can be. Nothing beats curling up with my girls to relax and watch a movie after a challenging day full of different things I did at work. Those things include many different roles that I must take on as a DSP.

During COVID-19, our roles as Direct Support Professionals expanded. We have taken on new tasks and have developed skills that we may not have deemed necessary six months ago. For example, we have become barbers, manicurists, seamstresses, landscapers/gardeners. Also, unexpected animals show up that we now need to learn and teach the individuals how to care for them.

Our new mantra is “think outside the box” for activities that will provide joy and happiness to the individuals we support. Who knew a ride through the car wash or an in-home game of BINGO could bring such pleasure. Many of us are accustomed to taking individuals out shopping. But since quarantine, our abilities have expanded to get what they need or want online. For example, Joe’s new chair, or Lawrence’s new shoes. Not items we would typically buy online, as they lose their sense of feel and comfort.

Like many other essential workers, the duties of a DSP calls for balance, preparation, and sacrifice. Often, we are at work celebrating an individual’s birthday, a holiday, or planning activities on any given weekday. We are away from our families and may miss important moments with them. But knowing that we are making special, happy, meaningful memories with the individuals we are supporting is one of the most important things we can do as a DSP. Recently, the houses all celebrated Memorial Day with cookouts, dancing, and lots of yummy food!

Pictured below: Sherrill Lane & Riverside homes cooking out:

We have even had to change the way we celebrate birthdays. Instead of hanging with friends & family and partying like rockstars, we throw surprise parades!

The best one so far was for Mr. Martin Eudy. He had NO idea it was happening. It was a magical moment to celebrate Martin!

The Roswell community came together in such a powerful and enjoyable way. Police, Fire, Disaster Relief, even other Tobosa homes and a lot of our employees joined in on the fun.

Martin was blessed with a parade filled with all of his favorite things. Friends, family, fire trucks, police cars, and of course, presents! Just look at the smile on his face.

Sadly, not everything is all cake and ice cream with sprinkles and hot fudge. As DSPs, we have to find ways to explain COVID-19 and quarantine, so that the individuals will understand. Seeing their disappointment when they can’t go to the movies, shopping, on road trips, or even out to eat has been very hard. For one of the individuals I support, it has been a challenge to explain to her why she isn’t able to visit her mother. In that past, she would visit her mother at Mission Arch a few hours a day. She does to talk to her mom on the phone, but I know she misses her and asks when she can visit her mother again daily. It breaks my heart to tell her it isn’t safe to go. She understands, but I can see in her face and body language that she is not happy.

Still, there are many positive sides to being in the homes with the individuals all day. These include teaching baking/cooking skills, watching them enjoy their favorite chair, getting plenty of exercises in, or even discovering their inner Pablo Picasso!

Speaking of Picasso, what better way to show our strength and unity not only within our Tobosa family but as a whole community? Sherrill Lane took advantage of the downtime to decorate their windows and then challenge other houses, creating the Inspirational Window Challenge! They called out the La Paloma house, and it continued from there. What fun it was to see all the amazing ideas and inspirational windows that the homes created!

COVID-19 has allowed us to slow down, relax, and enjoy things that we may have taken for granted. During this pandemic, there are ever-changing rules, policies, and guidelines set forth by our country, state, and local government. Together, we need to take it all in stride. There is a saying I hear a lot on the radio, that is, “this too shall pass.” We will get through this together. And when it is all over, there better be one heck of a party!

Creator: TomasSimkus | Credit: Getty Images/iStockphoto

Biking for a Purpose

May 4, 2020 By Melinda Olivas Leave a Comment

Biking for a Purpose

By: Rosy Rubio

New Year’s resolutions!!! Usually, I take some time to consider a resolution seriously. 2020 was no different. This year I took more time doing some soul searching and created more unanswered questions in my life than I should have.

A little bit of how this happened:

Over the holidays, I visited with a nephew in Oklahoma City. We engaged in a pretty heated discussion regarding family obligations and the different roles my siblings and I hold in caring for my elderly parents. During the conversation, I very strongly declared that my role was to be the primary caregiver of my parents because it was easier for me with no spouse or children to care for. I continued that my siblings had their roles as parents, grandparents, etc. Their purpose in life was different due to their circumstances.

Following this conversation, my younger sister committed to riding her bike from Las Cruces to Santa Fe before the 2020 Legislative session. Her route brought her through Roswell. I committed to riding with her the 96 miles to Vaughn, NM. As I prepared for this huge endeavor, I started thinking about what the purpose was for my sister to do this. I concluded that her purpose in life, at this moment, was to care for the population of New Mexico in her role as a House Representative. Her bicycle ride was purposely connecting her to communities, their struggles, and challenges. She would need these connections to make quality decisions for all New Mexicans during the 2020 Legislative session.

With this in mind, on January 15, I joined my sister, Angelica, on her trek to Vaughn, NM. It was a brutal ride! Thanks to a higher power, my bike got a flat at 35 miles, and I was not able to continue. What a relief!!! However, during the 35 miles of riding, all you can do is think and think some more. I started to think about the purpose of the lives of those around me. I thought of my purpose in life. This is very difficult to do and identify. I have not fully defined what my purpose in life is really. It changes from time to time. One purpose, as mentioned earlier, is to be my parents’ caregiver. I also feel a purpose in continuing to support and lead Tobosa and its mission.

During the holidays, I watched a movie, “Peanut Butter Falcon.” Excellent movie that totally relates to this entire thought process of having a purpose in life. Zac’s purpose in life is to become a professional wrestler, and he seeks this on a daily basis. This led me to think about the individuals we support at Tobosa daily and what their purpose in life is. Do they have a purpose in life? Maybe they do. Perhaps they have one and do not know it. Maybe they don’t have a purpose in life and are not seeking one. But I genuinely believe that they do not have a purpose in life.

During my bike ride to Vaughn, I thought a lot that our goal at Tobosa should be to help find opportunities for the individuals we support to find their purpose in life. Surely they have more to offer of themselves, and to society, than to experience activities meaningless to them only to assure Tobosa meets standards and regulations.

Our Mission

We empower people with developmental delays or disabilities, and their families, to independently fulfill their life goals and dreams.

It is our duty and responsibility to aid them in finding their purpose and live meaningful lives. So… CHALLENGE ACCEPTED! 2020 will be the focus of this challenging endeavor for Tobosa. Because not only do we need to help individuals find their purpose, we also must help our workforce find their purpose in life. If we are not clear of our purpose, how can we help others find theirs?

As Mark Twain said, “The two most important days in life are the day you were born and the day you find out why”!!! We all have a purpose in life…let’s find out what that is and live it!

So is it Working? T.E.A.C.H.

April 17, 2020 By Melinda Olivas 5 Comments

So is it Working? T.E.A.C.H.

By: Jacob Dicello

If you read my last blog, no wait, let me rephrase that, “you darn sure better have read my last blog!” You may remember that I was concerned about the perception of the individuals that we support at Tobosa. Tobosa, and its consumers, are no doubt misrepresented in some peoples’ minds. I want to climb a mountain top with a megaphone and correct the misperception all at once! I want instant gratification. I want the individuals that we serve to get their proper due and be viewed as they deserve to be seen. And I want it NOW! But, such is life and I have to take a deep breath, calm down and face the reality that this may never change. Just as I was at exasperation’s end, I attended a meeting directed by Tobosa’s C.E.O., Rosy Rubio; she went on to admonish that we are now in full T.E.A.C.H. mode. Acrostically, this represents:

The point of this is that we have to focus on change by teaching. This happens one day at a time, one opportunity at a time. Real change, if it is to adhere, takes time and effort. I took it to heart and told myself, “if Rosy believes in it, then I will too.”

So…is it working? Are we getting anywhere? Is the perception of Tobosa-supported individuals changing?

Case Study: My Father

My dad is a great man with many exceptional qualities, and I look up to him like no other. As you will see, he is also very frustrating, hard-headed, and old fashioned. Well, he had the same perceptions of the individuals that we support that I did when I obtained employment with Tobosa a little over a year ago. We would discuss my new job, and I would turn bright red and correct him through closed, gnashed teeth when he used statements like “those kinds of people” or “that autistic guy you all take care of.” The most cringe-worthy and my least favorite of these was when he would refer to “them” as “slow.” If I was not guilty of these same mistakes before I became educated about these wonderful individuals, I might have blown a gasket every time I spoke to my father about my job. “No”, I said to myself, “I’m not going to let it bother me, this is just an opportunity to change that perception”. So off to work I went on the Old Man’s brain.

To give you some context, I changed his perception of a subject ONCE and that was after we were stranded on the highway because he swore we had enough gas to get to the next town. In the mule dictionary, the word “stubborn” has a picture of my father next to it. I would correct him at every turn and I would stop him every time he made an insensitive comment. I got mad. I tried being diplomatic, using positive reinforcement, negative reinforcement, the silent treatment. I just, for once, wanted him to refer to one of the individuals we support by name and not by their disability or worse. I used their names over and over, pounded their names into his skull! I got nowhere. How can I help change a mass perception when I can’t even get my own father to listen to me? Then, the magic happened.

As we were “shootin’ the bull” at a local restaurant one day, an old acquaintance walked up to our table. I call him an acquaintance because I don’t want to get inappropriate here. [If you truly want to know what I call him come see me.] He asks where I am working these days and I tell him Tobosa. He gets this “shit-eatin’ grin” on his face and gives the obligatory “you really fit in with those people” jokes. You know, the standard lame-brained wisecracks. I stayed calm, but I was dying inside. I was picturing Martin’s and Anthony’s and Lynette’s and Dee’s and Cecil’s faces and was contemplating throwing a left hook on their behalf. But no, I would never stoop to this guy’s level. I kept reminding him that the individuals we support are just that, Individuals, one of us. I was practically begging him to stop being such an ass. He made one more comment that I refuse to repeat. My fist balled up, and my face turned red. I was in the process of standing up and throwing down when my dad stands up and gets in this guys face and calmly, but firmly, says,

“If you ever talk about these people again you’re going to go into the category of people that we refer to as hospitalized.”

Those of you that know my dad know that he is scary when he’s upset. He is a right to life strong-man that has thrown around rolls of carpet most of his adult life. I don’t mean rolls of carpet that are room-sized. I’m talking about the rolls from the factory. The man’s hands are big balls of calloused knuckles.

He was raised up north in Wisconsin, near Chicago. Rumor has it that he was recruited by the Mafia to be a bruiser when he was a young man, and claims that he turned down the offer. I often wonder if it had anything to do with him abruptly moving from Wisconsin to New Mexico when he was a young 20-something back in the late 1960s. He has given some vague, unsatisfactory answers as to why he moved so far away, but I digress. The main point is this guy didn’t want to test him, even as my dad is now in his late 60s. To this guy’s credit, he got the point. He apologized, and my dad bought him a cup of coffee.

My dad had come through when it meant the most. Slowly, but surely, his perception had changed. And as for the jerk-o, let’s just say his understanding changed much quicker than my dads did.

I learned that day that you might not be able to reach everyone all the time, but you can use every opportunity to T.E.A.C.H., as Rosy proposed. It will make a difference, and it will hit home, eventually. If my dad can change his perception, anyone can…even the mules.

Rolling Into a New Location in the New Decade

March 4, 2020 By Melinda Olivas 1 Comment

Rolling Into a New Location in the New Decade

By: Jessica Dunn

With this new decade, we rolled right into a new office! As many of you know, our administration staff for the Adult Services moved to a new location in the 2^nd Street Plaza West in the fall of 2019. At that time, the rest of the Adult Services team, including the Nursing Department, Team Coordinators, and Community Options, stayed at the Summit office; this created a divide we were not accustomed to. Luckily, toward the end of the year, another Plaza suite opened up, and we acquired it reuniting all the team members who are now all located at 204 W. 2nd Street. We were able to move them all in one day on January 2^nd, very impressive! Everyone pulled together, and with our mighty “manpower,” we got the entire move done in one day, impressive! Thank you to everyone who chipped in.

After the dust settled and people arranged their new offices, I felt this overwhelming feeling of completeness. It felt as if the rest of our tribe had returned home from a long journey. I know the feeling was mutual from the chatter around the administration office. The reference to us all being part of the Tobosa family was more evident than ever in the way that I felt. As I write these expressions, I cannot help but smile, remembering the first few times I was able to take a short walk over to the other suite solely to say, “Good morning!”, or call out, “Are you guys good?”. It felt great to be within shouting distance again. These simple check-ins were something that took much more effort and time in the months before January.

Nursing Waiting Area
Team Coordinators & Community Options

I began wondering if other people in our organization felt the same as I did. I mean, surely I wasn’t the only one beaming with positive emotions over this; after all, it was just a simple office move from 0.9 miles away. My curiosity compelled me to find out if others felt the same way. Talking to people about their feelings and experiences since the move forced the corners of my mouth to rise involuntarily. I found myself smiling again because I was comforted that the feeling was mutual. The following are some reactions I received:

“I like it. It is more of a professional setting. It feels more like a nursing office than the other one did.”

“Moving was good because we were able to go through things and
declutter.”

“We are not away from everyone any longer, and now people know
where to find us. We are back to being more of a part of Tobosa.”

“It happened quicker than we thought. We worked together, and we got
it done.”

“Being in this building puts us closer to the administration. This is good
so that we can get a hold of them.”

“Since the move, we have a feeling of being a more cohesive unit. (Before the move, these departments felt very detached.)”

“In the end, we are all here for the same reason. It is good for us to be
together. Before the move, even just being a hallway apart felt like a
whole world apart.”

“I like being close to the Team Coordinators. There is a better rapport,
and it allows for more leniency between these departments. It is now
easier to Invite them to pow wow in the nursing department so we can
take care of stuff right away.”

So, as you can see, the overall feeling about our move was a good one. Our team is a close team that needs the support of each other. The time that we were able to share a building with Los Pasitos allowed us to build a rapport with them, and both programs were able to learn more about each other and how the other one operates. Even though there were benefits to us sharing a building between programs, a time came when it would be more beneficial for everyone for this move to happen. By the adult services departments moving to 2nd Street, we not only gained the benefits mentioned above, but it also allowed room for the children services to be able to expand and share their talents and services with more kids in our community. I am very optimistic about the growth and future of all the Tobosa programs.

Rate Study/Legislative Expectations for 2020

October 24, 2019 By Melinda Olivas Leave a Comment

Rate Study/Legislative Expectations for 2020

By Rosy Rubio

Early 2019, along with other state-wide providers, Tobosa participated in a rate study conducted by PCG through the Department of Health, Developmental Disabilities Supports Division. The outcome of the rate study would provide PCG the opportunity to recommend reimbursement rates commensurate to regulation for individuals receiving services through the traditional Developmental Disabilities Waiver, Medically Fragile Waiver, and Mi Via Waiver.

Based on the information provided by Tobosa and other statewide providers, we were pleasantly but not really surprised that the rates paid through the Developmental Disabilities Waiver were significantly short of the actual cost of providing services. The final report stated DD Waiver rates were underfunded by 19% overall and included programmatic recommendations to improve the outcomes of the system, including an objective assessment process, streamlining administrative practices to include Waiver redesign and implementation of a new waiver to assist people on the statewide waiting list for services. Currently, New Mexico’s waiting list has more people on the list than actually receiving services.

How are we going to cut back/down this list?

Governor Michele Lujan Grisham has committed to a six-year, three-phased plan to eliminate the DD Waiver waiting list. This will involve investing resources that link individuals to program options that ensure MCOs comply with state contracts, implements a support waiver by 2020 for people on the waiting list, and streamlines the existing DD Waiver by applying an assessment tool to better allocate services.

New Mexico and those involved with this vulnerable population understand that a strong, solid, and healthy DD Waiver system is a must for people coming off the waiting list. The system needs a rate structure that sustains a well-trained workforce and assessment processes that can provide specialized services for those children and adults with high general support, behavioral and medical needs. In looking at all services, we should also accommodate those individuals with lesser needs and help them successfully live their lives as they choose.

The process seems overwhelming and challenging. However, New Mexico’s statewide provider system contains the expertise, the experience, and the institutional knowledge to create a comprehensive system that addresses mandated services with proper reimbursement rates while valuing the direct support professionals who can earn a good living wage.

TOBOSA’S MISSION

We empower people with developmental delays or disabilities, and their families, to independently fulfill their life goals and dreams.

Tobosa is grateful to everyone that continues to support the organization. Tobosa celebrated 41 years of providing excellent, quality services for children and adults of Chaves County. With the help of our stakeholders, including our area legislators, we firmly believe that New Mexico will fund the rate study recommendations, making Tobosa a better and stronger organization. Tobosa will continue moving forward with its mission to support individuals with developmental disabilities to reach their level of independence.